It’s not racism, if you’re ugly.

Someone call the ACLU, this does nothing for me. Except... well those are some nice legs. Too bad they are Asian legs... sigh

Can we please stop screaming racism when someone expresses they are not attracted to people of a particular ethnicity?

I just finished reading an article from a gay Asian man (gaysian?),upset because white and Hispanic men are not often times attracted to him. A two page pity party about euro centric standards of beauty taking over the gay community and how he had had enough of it, ensued. Rawrrr!

It wasn’t the due to the fact that he was visibly unattractive or just not physically the type of those particular men, it was obviously because he was Asian and the world was engaged in a secret plot with Ralph Lauren, designed to make him feel ugly. Paranoid much?

He honestly thinks that, because the gay advertising world doesn’t place enough Asian models in their ads, that this somehow influences people to suddenly find Asian men unattractive? It’s magic! It’s odd too, because I see images of skinny twinks all the time and I wouldn’t make out with a twink with Charlie Crist’s lips.

When was the last time you found yourself attracted to an entire race of people, because some model in some random magazine filled out his boxers nicely? That’s like hating scientologists, but then wanting to bone the whole cult, because you thought Gionvanni Ribisi looked hot as a stuffed animal in “The Other Sister.” (Which he totally did)  Or suddenly being overtaken by the urge to become homosexual because you saw how well I filled out a pair of jeans.

Please. You know I fill them out well.

The majority of gay magazines are dripping with images of twinky, starving, emaciated men (of all races) and yet I have somehow never found myself attracted to walking skeletons. Apparently I am the only person who derives my sexual attraction from my own personal choices, as it seems every other gay man in the world is forced to find only the men in gay magazines as acceptable standards of beauty. Apparently, my attraction to white and Hispanic men is based on repressed racism and it has nothing to do at all with the fact that I just like lighter skin and curly pubic hair. Great, for all my civil rights struggles, I come to find I am a racist because I don’t want to bone someone from every continent. It’s a small world after all.

The writer goes on to claim he is going to join his” queer Asian brothers in arms” and fight against the racism of the gay community and spark a revolution. All the while, reminding everyone that he is no longer dating guys based entirely on whether or not they are white. So, in other words, it’s OK for him to blatantly turn away men because of their skin color, but not OK for you or I to have a physical preference.

At this point I had to step away from the computer and look out the window, making sure the earth was still in fact rotating around the sun and not this man’s head.

I am also an ass man, should I slap myself every time someone without an ass hits on me and I graciously decline? Assicist!

I find myself attracted to deaf and blind folks, so does that mean I am reverse racist? No no, because those things are not based on race, they run the whole gamut. Kind of like… gee I don’t know… SEXUAL ATTRACTION? (Do you see how I put that in caps there? That’s how you know it was super serious.)

So now I am a sexist because I don’t find woman attractive, racist because I don’t like Asian guys, insensitive because I don’t like obese men, warped by pop culture because I find white men attractive and perverted because I like my men with a big ass and muscles. I can not even begin to imagine my therapy.

So after all of this, I came to the conclusion that this is not even related to racism, not even on a fundamental level. It’s actually quite simple. This guy was probably not that attractive, or to put it bluntly, he was ugly. Its OK dude, I get it. I have mediocre skin, some extra weight on me and my beard grows half ass-ed, but that doesn’t mean I am entitled to call everyone a racist because they don’t want to fuck my whiteness. Maybe its OK to be ugly, or just not everyone’s cup of tea.

Every time someone pulls out this nonsense, the ACTUAL acts of racism loose all of their power. You want something to bitch about?

Bitch about the fact that I never see people like me in magazines, people with massive eyebrows and man tits. Or better yet, get over yourself.

Burn bitch… burn.

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