Pirates Attack ‘S.S. Facebook’

So, Facebook is at the center of controversy yet again.  This time, not specifically for it’s privacy settings at the present… but more so for it’s privacy settings in the past.  A web-pirate named Ron Bowes had designed a code that downloaded every single bit of information that was (at the time he ran the code) public.  He put that information into a downloadable file and posted it online.  So, no matter how you set your security settings today, whatever they were at that time will be reflected in your information what is available to download.  That’s what’s up.

Here’s what I think about it.  “I don’t give a shit.”  I’ve never really been worried about my information on Facebook because I’ve never posted anything about myself worth compromising.  I’ve never had my address or Phone Number posted anywhere.  And when my college e-mail address login expired, I set up a whole new alternate e-mail address just for Facebook… because e-mail is free and I felt like doing it.  I never check that e-mail as it is just for Facebook.  So, if people are spamming it or giving it out, it makes no difference to me.

That doesn’t really leave much for public-view.  Now, if people are sooooo determined to find out the fact that my interests include Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Harry Potter, I just find that to be a horrible waste of time.  But kudos for taking an interest!

Here’s my advice to you, Facebooker:  Don’t post anything on Facebook that you might one day be ashamed of.  Ie. Phone Numbers, Addresses, Active E-mails, etc.  And while we’re on the subject:  Keep your “pucker face,” “nude,” & “drunk-mess” pictures away from the digital world.  We will find them and sell them for profit… then your children will find them years (or months, depending on how easily you settle) down the road and they will have a lot more awkward questions for you.

I realize that, right now, some of you have the “oh shit” look on your face because you’ve just now realized that you haven’t detagged yourself from those pictures in Vegas and you’ve just applied for a job at a well-to-do Marketing firm. Well… Best of Luck!

p.s. Can’t wait to see the movie!”

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Queers have bad taste – Chapter 1

I get flack all the time for being an outsider of sorts among my gay friends and the community as a whole. To be honest, I find a large part of what is considered “gay culture” to be crap. I don’t mean crap as in something old and useless that can be thrown away, I mean actual shit. I am such a dick.

I remember when Keisha came out and sang that really popular song about smelling and what not, so many of my gay friends were falling over themselves with awe. There is one thing I have noticed among these types of performances, the sluttier, the trashier, the more of an overt sexual train wreck, the better. Often times, the media in question doesn’t even have to be produced well or have a lot of quality put into it, the mere presence of a gay person or gay theme grants it an instant pass. I am sure at this point you are wondering why I even care and to that I have 3 words.

“Gay themed films”

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Tanning Memberships Plummet in Arizona

Location: Aryanzona, US

Now, don’t correct me if I’m wrong, but this new law would be a lot like carrying your ID with you at all times, right?  From what I can tell, I would liken it to a bartender carding someone at the bar when they’ve already been carded at the door.  Yes, it’s a hassle, but at the end of the day it should take just a few additional moments. The reason the bartender is carding you a second time is because you look like you are breaking a law (buying alcohol under 21 years of age.) Just don’t be caught without your papers.  “I left my green card in my other wallet” won’t really cover your ass in this situation.

Now, I for one am fine with this law in this context.  However, the problem is that this matter is not as simple as “you look too young.”   It’s a matter of “you look like a wetback.”  There really is no nice way to put it because that’s the sort of door this opens.  It’s a lot like the “at-random” bag searches at the airports after 9/11.  Anytime they were called in, Citizens of Middle-Eastern descent felt that they were being targeted for acts of violence done by people of their same ethnic background… and in some ways, they were.

I am American.  I come from a family of Mexican descent … and have never even actually been to Mexico.  I would have no qualms about being asked for my papers if they were trying to target Illegal Mexicans in a Border State.  I just think that seems like more work for them than it’s worth.

What worries me personally is that there are those out there that hate just to hate.  These people are called racists, sexists, homophobes, etc., and I can think of a few other things to call them.  I have experienced my share of racism and profiling:  from having to sneak around with a girl I was dating back in high school because her parents didn’t want her to date me because I’m “Mexican” to surprising people who don’t know me with my ability to read and write big words… in English.

I just don’t want to be out walking down a street with a bag of oranges and suddenly get pulled up alongside by a pick-up truck full of rednecks who have decided that this is a good day to have gotten boozed up and “Help Our Country” by beating the crap out of me.  If this can be avoided… that would be awesome.  Yay for not bleeding!

To those who may be flirting with this idea, to assist you in spotting Me and other Mexicans, I’ve provided the following checklist:

• We will most likely be wearing a sombrero, a poncho, chanclas (sandals), and denim shorts… that used to be denim jeans.
• We will also have tattoos of any combination of a teardrop, the Virgin Guadalupe, or the colors Red White & Green.
• Around our necks, you’ll find Selena concert tickets that we’ve had bronzed and attached to a chain.
• We will have brown skin, smell of fajitas, be carrying a bag of oranges or gum, and be surrounded by at least 11 children that are dressed in a similar fashion.

I hope this helps!

“I want to go to there”

I have a feeling this video pisses off starving people all over the world. Not only do we as Americans tend to be FUPA queens, but we will also eat nearly anything as long as it is deep fried or appears on a list of Oprah’s favorite things.  In fact, things are so good here in America, that even our animals eat better than the people of Malawi. However, considering the crap they are putting that gay couple through, I am tempted to say this cat is more deserving of a magical food adventure.

This Friskies commercials graces my screen every hour or so, it centers me, brings me calm and giddy excitement. This lucky cat is literally going on a journey to delicious and beyond. Imagine jumping through a magical portal, to be greeted by delectable dancing turkeys who can’t wait to be eaten. Then, just when you think things couldn’t get better, Fish Boat appears and whisks the cat away to an island where drumming chickens roll out the red carpet for him. Finally, as if to tempt the senses with impending overload, the cat gets to come back home where a delicious can of turkey squirt is waiting for him. I can think of worse ways to end the day.

Best video ever! Suck it Malawi.

Iceland laughs at our attempts to pronounce their stupid drunk language.

Eyjafjallajokull

Let me preface this by saying, “I love Iceland and Bjork is just swell.”

Now that we have put that behind us, it’s time to laugh at the world and it’s attempts to pronounce the volcano that recently erupted in Iceland. I have seen this thing written down and  it sounds like someone was trying to transcribe the sound a whore makes after performing fellatio on 100 different men in a short period of time. Imagine it, a court stenographer sitting quietly trying to type the very sound that would fall from those exhausted lips.

That is just nasty.

In all fairness, the name of this volcano is hideous and it would be more fair to laugh at the people who named it than those who can’t pronounce it. It’s the same thing as dressing up in drag and creating a gaudy character out of it, then mocking your friends because they make prettier women than you do. It’s not them that failed, it’s you. It’s you Iceland. Watch the video here.

Kelsey Grammer stands up for unbiased media, by promoting biased media.

Kelsey Grammer has signed on as the spokesperson for The Right Network, a right leaning news network that claims to be in support of unbiased media and accountability. Which is rather ironic, as the name itself lends one to see the true intentions of the project. This is similar to someone starting a non partisan think tank and calling it, “Suck it Liberals, we beat off to Ronald Reagan’s ghost.” all while espousing the virtues of being unbiased. In other words, Fox News will have more company in crazy town with the bastard child of stupidity and white flight.

I can only assume this fall jarred loose the section of his brain that is responsible for the perception of irony.

Based on the logic of the folks behind these views, because the word “right” can mean “correct”, their views must be correct as they are right leaning. Point one for the literalistic, even a turd can float.

Tea Baggers and the case for mandatory college education.

I came across this video while reading Joe.My.God today and it was so hilariously succinct in portraying these people that it was almost overdone. The very mention of factual evidence causes these people to go into a mind numbing phase of non existence. It is one thing to disagree with a policy and another to blatantly disregard factual evidence in exchange for the feeling something gives you. To watch these Luddites complain about their taxes, while they are trying desperately to ignore the fact that they pay less this year, is like watching a child get caught in a lie and try and get out of it by pretending to choke to death.

Did anyone else do that as a kid? “Justice, did you cut off your sisters bangs?… Answer me right now!… Oh for fucks sake, it’s not going to work this time, you don’t have anything in your mouth. You know, I have never struck a child and I have always been proud of that, but I am willing to be proud of something else today.”

At one point one corrects the journalist by saying, “A tax cut is not the same as a tax credit.” This is absolutely correct, as they are different words for a reason. However, the fact still remains that this bagger still pays less taxes than he did last year, thus negating the entire purpose of the event. It is always interesting watching the dumbing down of America, especially when they are filled with nothing but contradictory talking points. Obama is a socialist and a communist as much as he is a human being and an Orca. The point being that you can be one or the other, but not both, much like a tax cut can not be a tax credit, but a redneck can be ill informed and still assume he is well versed in the bullshit he subscribes to.

All of this comes down to one simple thing.  These crackers are pissed that a nigger is in the White House.

Obama is a socialist minded Muslim and the Anti-Christ.

The Muslim, Socialist, Anti Christ is here!