“God hates Lady Gaga” claims Fred Phelps. “I hate Fred Phelps” claims everyone else.

Good ol’ Fred Phelps is at it again!

He and his Westboro Baptist “church” members have set their sights on the pop/performance artist Lady Gaga claiming she is some kind of evil, senseless whore who was sent forth to turn our younger generation’s hearts and minds away from God and toward her glittery peash.   All I can say is, wow.

Phelps’ church is currently in the midst of a campaign against Lady Gaga stating in a recent press statement their intentions to picket Lady Gaga’s next performance in St. Louis, MO on January 7.

“Thou hadst a whore’s forehead, thou refusedst to be ashamed…Will He reserve HIs anger forever? Will he keep it to the end? Behold, thou hast spoken and done evil things as thou couldest.” Jer 3:3,5

“Art” and “fashion” are the euphemisms, the guise under which proud whore Lady Gaga teaches rebellion against God (incidentally, her claim to the title of “lady” is sound only if she tacks on “of the night,” thereby alluding to another euphemism of what she is.) As much as she’d like to pretend otherwise, there’s nothing new or different about this particular hussy’s pretentious prancing. Does the simple slut truly think that she can change God’s standards by seducing a generation of rebels into joining her in fist-raised, stiff-necked, hard-hearted rebellion against Him? Get real!

Even as she gives lip-service to “liberating” her young fans, Lady Gaga brings them into slavery to their own corruption, teaching them to glory in their shame. She hates you! “For when they speak great swelling words of vanity, they allure through the lusts of the flesh, through much wantonness…While they promise them liberty, they themselves are the servants of corruption!” 2 Pet. 2:18-19

YOU’RE GOING TO HELL.

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Open Thread Thursday – How do you feel about the current Health Care bill?

 

What are your thoughts on the shenanigans that are going on in the Senate? Do you feel this bill is good for the country? Do you think Obama has done enough to push forward legislation? Do you even read the  news? If not, what do you think about my hair?

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All I want for Christmas is a naked midget.

There, I said it. We all have things we are ashamed to admit in public, well now I am guilt free. It could be the fact that it’s 6 am, that I am hungry or that I took a weird hairy pill I found under the fridge, but whatever the case may be, I felt like being honest.

Don’t you look at me like that.

Chris keeps asking me what I really want for Christmas and there it is. I want to open up a big old box, wrapped with a bow, only to find an elf inside. I am pretty sure he could pull this off, because I read somewhere that midgets don’t use as much air as us, so the box would be fine with one perfectly placed breathing hole.

I expect this for Christmas, let it be known.

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My God knows how to lay the pipe.

 

Well it looks like an Australian church is in hot water for creating and advertising an image that, some say, is offensive to the idea of God and Christianity. The image (above obviously) depicts Joseph in bed with Mary with the words “God was a hard act to follow” placed above it. Joseph looks dejected, which may or may not have anything to do with the fact that the person he is sleeping with is a woman, while Mary looks like she is wondering if she had left the gas on. I would assume she did.

I take offense to this ad for simple reasons of factual dishonesty. I was always told that God had a little dick, so obviously his sexual prowess is in question.

The image was supposedly created to spark a discussion about the creation of Jesus and to force people to consider the real meaning and history behind Christmas. Now, I am not a religion man in the slightest, but I would think there would be several choices above this that may serve their purposes more appropriately. Perhaps maybe an image of Baby Jesus getting his DNA tested, with the words “Real men stick around”, plastered above his head. Or even just a big question mark with the words, “Why the hell would you want to be a Christian” in bright bold letters?

I digress.

The ad is apparently causing a discussion, but it’s not the nature that the church had intended. The local radios have been inundated with callers, furious about the images while other Christians are calling it sexist. One man, who claims to hail from a “liberal” church, says that the image makes it seem that God is a male and his church strongly objects to that idea.

“How dare you make assumptions about my made up religion! My God’s vagina is going to be furious!”

In other words, they have no problem accepting the idea of a virgin birth or a Jewish carpenter, but the sexual bits of God are still up for debate. Awkward…

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Husband and Wife Die Moments Apart After 59-Year Marriage

Okay call me a romantic, a big softy, a faggot, but this is sweet and touching.  This is the kind of love Justice and I have for each other.  We’ve made an agreement that if we don’t die together in our bloody death pact warm, loving relationship then whoever does die first has to come back and visit the other one on a daily basis.  It’s a sweet, morbid love we share.

Anyway, this past Saturday, an elderly couple in a Florida nursing home, who were said to be deeply in love with one another, passed away within moments of one another.

For 59 years, James and Lolie Brackin epitomized love and marriage, their children said.  After eloping in the back of a dump truck when Lolie was 16, the two spent the rest of their lives together, doing everything together…apparently. (KIDDING!)

“We’re going to miss them terribly, but we’re glad this happened the way it did,” their eldest of four daughters, Carol Gruver, told a local newspaper.

James served more than 25 years in the Army, including tours in Vietnam and Korea however the separation didn’t appear to diminish their affections for one another.  The Brackins were seen holding hands all the time and they called each other “honey” so often one of their grandchildren thought that was James’ name.  Lolie Brackin never liked going anywhere alone, and he was always with her, their family said.

Both James and Lolie had their share of health problems.  He lived with one of their daughters, while she remained in a nursing home however James had begun to grow weaker and on Friday he moved into the nursing home with Lolie.  The two spent one last night together before both passing away.  He was 79, she 76.

Their joint funeral service was scheduled for today Wednesday, Dec. 16th.

You can read the full story here at the Daily News of Northwest Florida.

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Roy Disney, Nephew Of Walt Disney, Dies

I’m sad to say that earlier today, Roy E. Disney, the nephew of Walt Disney, died.  He was 79.  Roy, who lost his year long battle with stomach cancer early Wednesday in Newport Beach, CA, was an avid supported of Disney’s art of animation as well as the arts in general and played a powerful role behind the scenes of the Walt Disney Co.

Company president and chief executive Bob Iger said Disney was much more than a valued 56-year company veteran.

Company president and chief executive Bob Iger said in a statement, “Roy’s commitment to the art of animation was unparalleled and will always remain his personal legacy and one of his greatest contributions to Disney’s past, present and future,” and Don Hahn, an executive producer at the Disney movie studio, praised Roy for ushering in a new era after taking over the animation department in 1984.  The two worked together creating several winners such as “Beauty and the Beast” and “The Lion King.”

“He took it under his wing, was a cheerleader, a coach, therapist,” Hahn said.

John Lasseter, chief creative officer for Walt Disney and Pixar Animation Studios, also commended Disney.

“He put his heart and soul into preserving Disney’s legendary past, while helping to move the art of animation into the modern age by embracing new technology,” said Lasseter.

For those of you who may or may not remember, Roy played a pivotal role in the ousting of  two of The Walt Disney Company’s former chief executives.  In 1984, after deciding the company was being steered into the wrong direction, Roy Disney resigned from the company’s board or directors and led investors in a campaign against Walt Disne’y’s son-in-law, Ron Miller.  After appointing the team of Michael Eisner and Frank Wells in charge, later becoming just Eisner (Wells passed away in 1994) and nearly 20 years later, Roy led shareholders in another revolt against Eisner which eventually forced him to step down giving way to Bob Iger.

Roy was described by friends and colleagues as a “gracious, humble gentleman” someone  who remained loyal to his principals and friends.  His legacy, despite never including a chance to run The Walt Disney Company himself, can be felt and seen within the company’s successes throughout the past 30 years.

An active philanthropist, Disney also supported the California Institute of the Arts in Valencia, a school founded by his father and uncle, as well as pledged $10 million back in 2005 to establish the Roy and Patricia Disney Cancer Center at Providence St. Joseph Medical Center in Burbank.

His absence will sorely be missed.

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“I Need A Handjob!”: The best commerical for the simplest product ever!

Handjob! Is the multi-grip system that everyone’s talking about! Are you feeling tired? Frustrated? Overwhelmed? Sounds like you need a Handjob!

Beware of sloppy imitations.  You could expect to pay up to $40 elsewhere.  But right now, you can experience all the pleasure and convenience of a genuine Handjob! for yourself for the low, low price of just $4.95 plus shipping and handling.

BUT WAIT!  Order now and receive a second Handjob! absolutely FREE!  That’s two Handjobs! for under 5 bucks!  You can’t beat it!  Keep one for yourself and give one to a friend…or keep them both! We won’t tell!

Click the “ORDER NOW” button to get yours! And remember, nothing says “I like you” this holiday season quite like the gift of a HandJob!

Handjob!  You deserve it!

The best part of this is it’s a real product.

The “Hand Job” which you can purchase here aids in tasks such as opening bottle tops and jars by gripping to the lid. The creators decided that despite the nature of the item, they’d give it a sexual name and make a hilarious and sexually suggestive ad in hopes that it would go viral.  Obviously it worked.  The ad is hilarious and definitely does its job.  I’m gonna get me a Handjob!

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Obama gives himself “solid B+” I give myself “Most Attractive Person EVER” See, I can make up shit too.

Well Folks, President Obama was at it again this past weekend with another one his signature sit down interviews.

America’ own Media Queen, Oprah sat down for a warm and fuzzy, one-on-one interview with President Obama for her Christmas at the White House special which aired Sunday night on ABC.  Oprah, who fawns over Obama so much she looks like the sad, middle-aged white women who fawn over Oprah, asked President Obama what grade he would give himself for his first year in office and boy what an answer he gave her.  “A good, solid B-plus” he responded in his sophisticated yet chocolaty smooth manner.

(video after the jump)

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